Dudas

The Pub Toilet

November 17, 2015

I never knew too much about it myself to begin with as I didn’t have a brother growing up so I wasn’t even aware. Later when I heard snippets of various mother’s conversations about the topic I never thought it could be that bad. They must be over dramatising it. Surely. Turns out those mothers were wrong: it was much, much worse than I could have ever have imagined.

Toilet training boys…Number ones. Wee. Wizz.

Teaching the precision art of aim; without having the actual equipment yourself.

Something that I wish I wasn’t so clued up on but unfortunately I am. With my previous career experience and now with a son of my own I am all too familiar with the epic fails that can happen in the toilet training business. And beyond. One of my first days as a wide eyed young child care trainee I was horrified to find a toy car sitting at the bottom of the children’s (clean) toilet. ‘EWWW, I am not getting that out of there‘ I thought to myself. That was early days. Very early days. From that moment on my visual tolerance level for anything disgusting, stinky and vile that a child can do has drastically risen. Because once you have seen someone else’s little darling vomit up fritz and sauce sandwiches, and then had to clean it up, that shit gives you iron guts. Or you can never ever eat fritz again. Or maybe a bit of both.

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Culinary

Savoury Scrolls, the Diamond way

October 28, 2015

Another one of our families favourite foods to snack on right now… the best part is that the combinations are endless! Again these are made in the Thermomix and I love that I no longer have to knead dough. Such a time saver! Thank fluck for technology…I would have failed miserably as a 50’s housewife. If you don’t have a ‘Therminator’ you can easily adapt this recipe I’m sure, but I can’t be arsed looking for that conversion method right now. #sorrynotsorry

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Childish, Hot Tips, Travel

Flying with Children (and surviving)

October 18, 2015

If you have ever flown anywhere with children you know it’s a whole new ball game. Gone are the days of a small carry on bag (if any at all) and swanky drinks in the airport bar. I longingly stare these people now when I see them effortlessly gliding through the airport without a care in the world. To the leisurely solo traveller in business class…you have no idea how much I would love to be sitting in your place for the entire duration of the flight.

Instead I am madly rushing to catch the red eye with a babe in one arm, handbag and overfilled nappy bag in the other and our plane tickets firmly clenched between my teeth. The Fournado is running ahead bumping into strangers having a wow of a time with his new found freedom, while I’m left wondering if I have remembered to activate the house security system, what time the flight was, fumbling through my bag to check I got my sunnies and lip balm, hoping I have my wallet and praying that I packed all the important things we require for the trip…did I mention it doesn’t matter if you are travelling for a few days or a few months – babies need the same amount of ridiculously oversized cargo either way! It is exhausting just getting off the ground!

We have flown to various destinations around the world with children in tow from a 50 minute flight to our closest capital city to the mother of all flights…22 hours to Europe and I have learnt a few hot tips along the way. So if you are planning a long haul flight with kids you might want to read on.

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Dudas

Heavy Breathing

October 14, 2015
The joys of putting baby to bed

 

Silent swift and stealth is what you have to be.

Bed time!

Say no more. The pinnacle of every parents evening. If we can just get through this last epic task we are home free…WineOclock! Sleep is such an underrated thing to those without the joys of children. Party all night and sleep all day; enjoy it while you can people.(Evil laugh) Fast forward a few years singeltons and it begins in pregnancy. You can’t sleep on your back. You must lay on your left side. Use the support of pillows. Blah blah blah. I was always so damn hot I would have to sleep near naked, giant tummy mountain blazing in full glory taking somewhat relief in the overhead fan pelting down from above. Meanwhile dear Muž would be a wearing a snow suit and 2 quilts as it was approaching the middle of winter…or sleeping on the couch. Apparently pregnant people snore too. As if…Pft. Continue Reading…

Childish

Magic Playdoh

October 9, 2015
how to make magic playdoh

Got a few spare minutes and a few bored kids to entertain?

Then ‘Magic Playdoh’ is your answer! Not only does it look spectacular but it is a novel way to teach young children the simple yet fun science of how to make a new colour from two other colours. This little craft idea has been a favourite of mine for a quite a while now and I like to do it during the quieter school holiday period when there is nothing much else on…boredom busters at it’s child-like best.

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Dudas

Arsenic Hour

October 1, 2015

There is no way around it. It has to happen eventually and the longer I put it off the worse they get. It starts at around 3:30pm, the afternoon hunger kicks in and I hear the fridge getting raided followed by sneaky little footsteps running to the couch. Giggles. Crumbs (I hate crumbs! And since when did we eat on the couch?) containers opening and rustling packages.

Fournado.

He is hungry again. He is always hungry. Hungry as in he ate whole T-bone steaks for dinner from age 2 and would would eat mine too if I wasn’t quick enough. He would never starve. He has quite good food related survival skills. And he is great at sharing with his little sister. Bonus! The other day I caught him feeding Juju and himself ice cream hiding behind the huge chair in the nursery. “Here you go Darling” he said, feeding one scoop to her followed by one scoop for him. So cute! I must admit I felt proud like a puffed up Mama pigeon at just how well he was sharing with her (and how little mess he had made!) but also slightly appalled that it was only 9:00am in the morning…Pick your battles.

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Culinary

Diamond Balls

September 21, 2015

If you are anything like me you’re constantly thinking of recipes and snack ideas to feed the never ending hunger that (my) children seem to have. You also want to feed your children relatively healthy choices without too much sugar, additives and numbers. Yuk!
Shop bought snacks are fine but I prefer to make as much home made food as possible.
I have been fine tuning this recipe for a while now and I have found the perfect balance with no sugar. Win! Continue Reading…

Dudas

Hide and Seek

September 21, 2015
Chanel pearl earrings

There is always a game of hide and seek going on at our house.
Sometimes it’s the game when we all know we are playing. The traditional favourite where one counts and the rest hide. An equal playing field. This game gets much more fun as the little ones get older and understand the concept of the rules. (and willingly follow them!)
We have recently moved into quite a large new home so it’s now an extra fun game with some really sneaky hiding spots that you could literally set up camp in and not be found for days. Sounds dreamy huh.
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Diamonds

Diamonds and Dudas

September 20, 2015
welcome mat

Hi!
My name is Jolie.
No! Not Julie or Jodie – Hello… I know how to spell my own freaking name, I have been doing it for 35 years!
Good Lord people stop correcting it!

I am a wife of nearly 2 years to my spunky husband “Muž” and Mother of a beautiful little pigeon pair – the “Fournado” and “Juju” who are full of energy and zest for life. Oh and they also have Fire. In. The. Belly. Its a wog thing. (and yes I can get away with saying that because I’m married to one and gave birth to two and I love them all very much…sometimes I feel like I am turning into one, its a good thing!)
They each make every day amazing, unpredictable, crazy, exciting and full of chaos.
Not just your normal kind of chaos…I mean full on, over the top, sideways looks from strangers chaos.
They are the inspiration behind starting this blog, every day is a comedy show in our home.

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